Beer Breath

 There is something about the smell of beer on someone's breath, when it's at the point where they should stop or haven't stopped when they should have - it sparks something in me. Sexual. 

Literally, I can grind off against something whilst inhaling their breath. I first thought it was T. But mostly anyone since. 

And I know where it comes from. My sexuality, my kink, my proclivities, my fantasies, come from when I was 15-17. J would only interact with me when drunk. And he drank beer. And he sneakily touched me. I was 15. He was 21. When I was 16, he was 22.  I didn't realize he shouldn't be doing that. I wanted it. Absolutely I wanted it. It was not against my will, Yes. Please. And I was not alone. My friends felt the same way. Ok I may have been a little ahead of them. But there were many at my level. Plus I hung out with someone 1.5 yrs ahead of me. But also I was sexual at a very young age, but that is another trauma story . 

I met him Memorial Day. My 16th birthday was way into our interaction (July) .  So I think I was already 15 at his bday , also in June or July when he said "this is my birthday? you invited my least favorite people" 

Referring to their friend forgethisname and me. I stormed into the bathroom , properly offended. He followed me in, to have the quintessential John Hughes (He had Emilio Estevez cheek bones, you know the ones that stick out a little that get pink easy, but hazel eyes.  Not green, not olive drab, a light ... Hazel)  bathroom talk about how "Look, you're a great kid but you are only 16...." My facial expression saying clearly saying "Weellllllll"..... And his hanging his head, shaking it, in a silent "fuck".  And when his birthday came along, I bought him a Mets Tshirt (because M. Told me too)

For my next birthday, 16, He got me a phone book that got eaten by M's dog.  M told me her dog ate HER phone book. Or that's what I understood. Which looking back on that may have been my bad. Lol. So he joked about the dog eating my present and I thought he was lying, or didn't know what he was saying. July. I was dating B by August. Having sex by September. J knocking on that door after that, asking "are you still a virgin?" But not able to keep it hard enough to penetrate me. After saying he "has something for me" while fishing out a magnum (yeah, that part is accurate) condom from his wallet. Him literally pulling up his pants and declaring "I gotta go", gather up himself, and was still fumbling when I caught up with him.  I don't remember what was said but I mumbled something like  "I could love you." Straight out of 16 candles. 

I Digress....beer. breath. Yeah. Its hot.